"Tell me the story of Connie and Phil!"
my sweet little daughter had said.
"Tell me the story! Tell me it now!
The one you made up in your head!"

"Now shh, little baby, I'll tell you the tale.
Be silent and don't make a peep."
"And hopefully," I silently thought to myself,
"you'll finally fall off to sleep."

"I met them at Dendrite, but I didn't know 'em
though Connie was silent but sweet
and Phil was the guy who you only met
when he yelled 'Fill out your time sheet!'

The company then was run by a man
who cared very little for others..."
"Go ahead to the good part!" my little girl screamed.
"Shh.. or you'll wake up your brothers.

Fate would be kind since we all were assigned
to meet one another again.
Paths finally crossed when SAI brought
our talents to mutual gain.

Connie started by answering phones
and Phil liked to manage the money.
But I think what he liked was spending the day
with the woman he often called 'honey'."

"No, no! To the end!" She jumped up and down.
"But sweetheart, how about when
the Dendrite stock bottomed and Phil danced for joy?"
"No! Go right to the end!"

"Okay. One day they retired." "Oh boy," she expressed,
"this is my favorite part!"
So she snuggled up into her blanked and smiled
and rapidly warmed up my heart.

"Hush. They retired. The party was fine.
We laughed and gave bad advice.
The buffet was so particularly grand,
that Tom went up not once, but thrice.

And then I went up and recited my poem.
The one that I've told you before.
The poem I wrote in their glorious honor.
The one that I called Nevermore.

'Nevermore would Connie be answering phones,
Nevermore would Phil try to fix 'em.
Nevermore would Connie purchase supplies,
Or Philip yell "Get all your picks in!"

Nevermore would Phil keep track of our money
Or Connie track our vacation,
Nevermore would Phil try to thwart our POs
"A phone? What's your justification?"

Nevermore would Connie get mad at the vendors
Who couldn't get anything right
Nevermore would they join us on Fridays where Everyone drank their way through the night.

No more. From then on they wintered in Florida Where they slowly perfected their game.
And summered up north where, well, funny you know,
They patiently did the same.'

And would we do well without Connie and Phil?
The answer was painfully clear.
The answer was "Yes!",
but only because of their leadership while they were here.

So see you in Nassau and let it be known
that anyone who has the pleasure
of meeting you Shirleys will always be welcome,
a feeling that I'm known to treasure."

And I stopped and my baby was snoring and sighing
and I took a free moment to pray
for the two of them. "May their golf balls go far
And be happy as they are today."

So I stood and I felt the warmth in my heart
and sunshine filling my belly
but before I could make it across the room,
she screamed "Now tell me 'bout Sheli!"

---
September 11, 1998, by Rob Konigsberg